Excellent Ideas, Had by Me and Others, At Total Fest XIV
August 24, 2015 § Leave a comment
It was the last Total Fest, I guess? I’m bad at goodbyes and endings in general, so here I will just continue to pretend like it is not over. Total Fest never fails to bring together amazingly smart, witty people being their awesomest. It is, per usual, impossible to capture all of the wonder, but here are 14 moments of brilliance from Total Fest XIV.
- A fine group of compatriots donned sarongs, leis and fake tattoos for a Total pre-party near the ZACC. Nobody wanted to talk to us. It was perfect.
- The esteemed Doug and Kia had the foresight to bring along a Winnebago, dubbed Total Fest 1, and managed to parallel park it in front of the Badlander. Goddamn American heroes, right there.
- The smoke made it too gross to go floating, so some supremely intelligent local wit (ahem) proposed taking Shellshag and Dead Bars out to Fred’s, where we had a fine afternoon of wholesome entertainment. (note: that link is not necessarily safe for work, depending on how uptight your work is)
- Heavy metal parking lot! Wherein I realized just how truly excellent it is to park on the top level of Central Park with a cooler of brewskis. I did manage to miss several bands this way, though, and my car has a distinctly, um, “herbal” scent that I cannot get rid of. Oh well. I did take note of Jonny Fritz’ #metal back patches, though.
- Speaking of Shellshag, who goddamn rule, a couple of local broads volunteered themselves as go-go dancers and proceeded to booty pop behind Jen’s drum kit. At one point, one of these slightly unsober go-go dancers fell into a hole in the floor, and was rescued by Shell. Undeterred, the dancing continued. (Why does the Palace have holes in the floor? I do not know.)
- So the Palace sets were on schedule and the VFW was running late on Friday (astonishing, I know) and I was terrified that I’d miss Divers. But I got to see Dead Bars rip it up, and then I full-on sprinted the four blocks to the VFW to catch most of Divers set. I am not a natural sprinter. It was worth it.
- #circlepit at Total Combined Weight. thanks for the free T-shirt, guys. I will treasure it.
- And after Divers, I returned to the Badlander, where the #circlepit got #erotic for the stoney vibes of Big Business.
- Humpy provided the perfect blast of hardcore down in the Palace on Saturday.
- Totally dug Kia’s red tights/cowboy boots/jorts combo while Sasshole played. Giant privilege to get to see Sasshole. Those ladies are an inspiration.
- That Thai beef salad that Lou brought to the barbecue on Friday. Best. Salad. Ever.
- Shout out to that dude outside the Badlander who was wearing a horse mask and playing guitar backwards. Really added to the atmosphere.
- Also a shout-out to my friend who cleaned up the puke in my sink. We know not who puked in the sink, nor do we care. It got cleaned up! Thanks a million.
- Ideal way to recover from Total Fest on
SaturdaySunday, time has no meaning for me anymore: Bistro brunch, Return of the Jedi on VHS, long shower and rejuvenating clay facial mask, barbecue and retrieval of various lost items at Grant’s house, and “Sherlock Holmes” reruns on PBS.
P.S., I took a handful of lousy pictures is all. But go check out Amy Donovan Photography’s Facebook for all of her sweet snaps.